Transformative Living Radio

Rewriting The Story Of Deservingness For Lasting Success

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What if the real barrier to your next breakthrough isn’t skill, strategy, or grit—but the quiet belief that you don’t deserve it yet? We pull back the curtain on the deservingness wound and show how hidden unworthiness can sabotage progress even when the résumé looks great and the calendar is full. From a candid corporate story of “making it” while feeling out of place to a client who rewrote her money identity and changed her results, we map the inner terrain that turns effort into ease.

Together, we unpack the difference between imposter syndrome and unworthiness—one questions performance, the other questions belonging. You’ll hear why permission matters more than potential, how identity acts like a thermostat for your outcomes, and where subtle phrases like “I don’t want to get my hopes up” quietly cap your capacity to receive. We name the cultural scripts that train us to over-earn and under-receive, and we offer practices that bring worthiness from concept to habit.

You’ll leave with a simple, powerful routine: a one-week letter to your younger self, present-tense affirmations that anchor a new self-image, and a way to spot opportunities that align with your values instead of your fears. Expect practical tools, resonant language, and frameworks you can apply right away to money, career, and relationships—without adding more hustle to your plate.

If this conversation nudges you to step into your worth, subscribe, share it with a friend who’s ready to stop auditioning for their life, and leave a review so more listeners can find these tools. Your next aligned yes might be one belief away.

To book your free discovery coaching session today, please click here.

Download my free eBook " Unlock Your Inner Authority"

SPEAKER_01:

Welcome to Transformative Living Radio, where we explore the power of intentional change for personal growth and fulfillment. I'm Andre Flax, your host and certified life and leadership coach. In our last episode, we talked about the law of mental magnetism, how your thoughts act like magnets, pulling towards you whatever you consistently think and feel. We explored how your mindset, your inner broadcast, creates your outer reality. But here's something powerful I want you to remember. You can think positive thoughts all day long. You can visualize, affirm, even work like crazy towards your goals. But if deep down inside you don't believe you deserve what you're asking for, you'll block it every single time. And that's where we're going today. We're going deeper. Because underneath every dream and every desire is the silent question, do I believe I'm worthy of it? And I'll be honest, I had to face that question myself. So if you've ever wondered why things seem to slip away just as they start to work out, if you've ever felt uncomfortable with your own victories, or even if you've been chasing the next breakthrough but doubting you deserve it, this conversation is for you. So grab a pen and a pad, and if you're ready, let's begin. For years, I've worked hard to climb the corporate ladder. Promotions, recognition, success. But even as the results showed up, something inside me still whispered, You don't belong here. I recall being promoted as the lead sales trainer for one of the largest publishing companies in the U.S. Now this was a huge deal for me. It was everything I prayed for. And yet instead of feeling proud, I found myself feeling uneasy sitting with other sales leaders of the company. Now it wasn't imposter syndrome, it was the feeling of unworthiness. You see, I hadn't yet accepted the fact that I deserved to be there. One morning I caught my reflection in the glass and saw a man who fought through pain, poverty, and limitations, but still couldn't receive his own success. And that's when it hit me. I didn't need to prove I was worthy. I needed to remember that I already was. That realization changed everything. And that's what this episode is about internal worthiness and deservingness. Now here's the truth. They get stuck because of unworthiness. You see, you can have all the talent, strategy, and discipline in the world. But if your inner narrative says, I'm not enough, that frequency will sabotage everything you touch. And it's subtle. It hides itself in phrases like, I just don't want to get my hopes up high, or I'll be ready once I learn a little bit more, or more popular, maybe I'm asking for too much. But those words all trace back to one belief, and that is I don't deserve it yet. When I look back on my own journey, I can see how that one belief once shaped my own choices and how often I accepted less because I didn't feel I was ready for more. And here's what I've learned from that, both in my life and in coaching others. The universe doesn't respond to your potential, it responds to your permission. So before we go any further, I want you to pause and ask yourself where in your life have you been playing it small? Not because you can't do more, but because you haven't yet given yourself permission to receive more. Now, this next statement might sting a little, but it's truth. You don't attract what you want, you attract what you believe yourself to be. Let me say that again. We don't attract what we want, we attract what we believe ourselves to be. If you identify as a struggler, you'll keep finding struggle. If you see yourself as the one who almost makes it, you'll keep repeating near misses. However, when your identity shifts, when you start saying, I am ready, I am capable, I am deserving, everything in your world starts to align with that truth. I once worked with a client named Tasha who had this very challenge. She was successful on paper, but constantly anxious about money. She'd make more money and then lose it. When we dug deeper, she said, quote, I've always told myself I'm just not good with money. Now that identity kept her in a cycle of scarcity. So we worked on changing her inner story and changing her self-talk to say, I'm learning to be a great steward of wealth. Within a few months, not only was she able to pay off her debt, but she was able to attract new clients. Now she didn't change her work ethic, she changed her identity. So let me ask you when you think about abundance, success, peace, who do you believe yourself to be in that picture? Are you someone standing outside the door waiting to be invited in? Or are you someone who already belongs in the room? Now, for many of us, this sense of unworthiness didn't start in adulthood. It was handed to us much earlier. We heard things like money doesn't grow on trees or don't get too comfortable. We've watched people work themselves into exhaustion just to survive and internalize that struggle as normal. That's what I call the deservingness wound. It's the belief that you have to earn good things, that rest has to be deserved, and that joy comes only after suffering. Now, I carried that wound for years. Even after reaching success, I downplayed it. I'd feel guilty when life got easier, like at an owed an explanation for my blessings. But one day during my meditation, I heard something that stopped me cold. And that was you don't have to earn what's already yours. Now that truth opened something inside of me because the more I stopped performing for worthiness, the more peace, the more joy and abundance started flowing naturally. Now I want you to try this exercise. I want you to write a short letter to your younger self, the one who learned to hide or to earn or to prove. Tell them you deserve to rest, you deserve joy, you deserve love, and you deserve more. Read that letter out loud every morning for one week. You'll be surprised just how quickly your heart starts to believe it. When you start honoring your own worth, the world reflects it back to you. You'll notice it in the little things first. How you speak up more confidently, how you stop explaining your prices, how you say no without guilt. That's the vibration of self-worth. Now, I remember turning down a lucrative deal once. It would have been a big payout, lots of visibility, but my gut said, This isn't right. Now, years earlier, I would have ignored that feeling out of fear. But when you know who you are, you stop chasing what isn't aligned. A few months later, a better opportunity came along, one that matched my purpose and my peace. You see, that's what worthiness does. It clears the clutter so what's meant for you can find you. Now, if you've been attracting struggle after struggle, I want you to ask yourself, what belief is that experience reflecting back to me? Because the moment you upgrade your self-image, your outer world upgrades along with it. Now, as we wrap up this episode, I want to leave you with this thought. You've already proven you can work hard, you've already overcome obstacles that most people would have crumbled under. But now it's time to stop surviving and start receiving. You don't have to earn love, you don't have to chase peace, you don't have to hustle for your place at the table. You were born worthy, you were born deserving. So this week I want you to affirm I am worthy of success, I am worthy of peace, I am worthy of love, and I am worthy of abundance. Not someday, but right now. Now I want you to say it until it feels natural. I want you to say it until your actions reflect it, and I want you to say it until life starts responding to it. Because once you believe you deserve more, life will rise to meet that belief. You see, you don't have to chase success, you just have to remember who you are. And when you do, success will recognize you. Because it's been waiting for you all along. Well, that's our show for today. We hope that you found this episode both insightful and inspiring. Join us each week for practical tips, actionable insights, and inspiring stories to help you transform your life.

SPEAKER_00:

We hope you can join us. We'll see you soon. To experience a free coaching session with Andre Flaps, click the link in the show notes to vote your coaching session today or contact him at Andre at Transformative LivingRadio.com. If you enjoyed this episode, leave us a comment wherever you get your podcast and share it with friends.